Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Opinions expressed in this episode are personal. They do not necessarily reflect the views of this streaming platform.
[00:00:10] Speaker B: Good day, wonderful people, and welcome to another edition. Let's be diverse. I am your host, Andrew Stout.
This episode is dedicated to all my loved ones who've supported me through this journey. Those who have left us will always be in our hearts and will never be forgotten.
Our topic today is the mindset shift. How changing the way we think can change the way we lead.
My guest today is someone I just met, but I've become very inspired by them. Her name is Miranda Estes. Miranda, thank you so much for joining us today.
[00:00:46] Speaker C: Thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited to be here.
[00:00:49] Speaker B: You're very, very welcome. How are things with you, Miranda? What's going on? Give me the tea. Give me the deets. What's been energizing you these days?
[00:00:58] Speaker C: Ah, let's see. So I have just recently. I've been a nurse for 11 years actually, and I have just recently started taking on my own business of healing through working through emotional blocks and traumas and being a mindset and clarity and pattern specialist. So, yeah, so I've taken that journey on and I'm really excited to help people work through the issues that I struggled with in life, through depression and anxiety, medical issues, being severely overweight and really like, not wanting to be on this planet anymore. And I found things that really helped me heal. So I'm very excited to be taking on this journey to really help other people heal and work through. Through their emotional issues and other things they're struggling with.
[00:01:50] Speaker B: Well, thank you for sharing that. There's a lot of people out there who are probably in the same, or maybe in the same situation as you or have been the same situation or thinking about the same things that you're thinking about. So to be able to do what you're doing, I think that's super admirable to, to take that on and be that beacon of support for people is truly inspiring. So congratulations on that. That's amazing.
[00:02:15] Speaker C: Thank you so much.
[00:02:16] Speaker B: You're very welcome. Glad to hear that things are going well and, and glad to hear that you're on a. On a positive endeavor and. And things are going great. So super happy for you.
[00:02:27] Speaker C: Me too. It's exciting. And the people that I've been meeting and doing sessions with are just like the. Such. Such amazing souls. So it's just, it's really cool. Like, and getting to meet you and
[00:02:40] Speaker B: just
[00:02:41] Speaker C: connections and souls that I get to encounter and work with is just. It's been so cool.
[00:02:46] Speaker B: That's. That's awesome. That's awesome.
So before we begin, I always have a fun, thought provoking question that I ask all my guests. Miranda. Miranda, before we get going, are you ready for yours today?
[00:02:58] Speaker C: Sure.
[00:02:59] Speaker B: Okay. So this is an easy one. I think I. But I think you'll like it. So my question to you is, what is one lesson that has taken you the longest to learn?
[00:03:14] Speaker C: I think one lesson that's taken me the longest to learn is what a boundary is and how to know when to set one. I struggled through a lot of people pleasing, anxious attachment, narcissistic relationships. And when I was doing therapy a few years ago, they were like, you need to set some boundaries. And I was just still, like, I was in my 30s and I was like, I don't know what that means. Like, I couldn't grasp the concept of how to know when to set one and how you set one. And then through the last few years, as I've done all of this work and mindset work, and I finally realized, like, that creates internal conflict in me and I need to set a boundary. So that is a huge lesson that took me a long time to grasp, probably longer than it should, but I finally figured it out.
[00:04:08] Speaker B: That's awesome. And sometimes those lessons take us a little bit longer, but people that are listening now, they can't see your. Your smile, but I could just see the passion in your answer and, and what you've. What you've been able to develop and what you've been able to learn. So that's. That's super awesome.
[00:04:25] Speaker C: Yeah, it's been really cool.
[00:04:27] Speaker B: It is super cool. Well, thanks very much for having fun with me. I know you. You gave us a little bit of a teaser about yourself there, but what I'd love for you to do is to. To get us started is to tell us who you are and what really drives you to do the work that you do.
[00:04:43] Speaker C: So what really drives me to do the work that I do was, like I said, I struggled with depression and anxiety for a long time and medical issues and my weight. And then about three years ago, three, four years ago, I had anxiety really bad, and I thought I was having a heart attack. And I was having such bad pain. I was, like, rolling on the floor, like, thought I was dying. So I went to the ER in the middle of the night, and it ended up that my gallbladder was infected, inflamed, and I had stones.
And so they were like, you're going to surgery right away. And thankfully, the surgeon that came down I used to work with in trauma icu. And I was like, I feel like just going to surgery doesn't fix the problem. Like, why am I having this issue with my gallbladder? And if I take it out, does it just move on to the next organ? Like, what is the root cause?
And so he agreed with me. He had had his gallbladder out and tried to prevent his. And he made it about a year and a half.
So he was like, you can try, like, but you're gonna have to change your whole life. And I was like, okay. So I got out of the ER and I went home, and I, like, cleared the shelves, and I was like, I'm changing my life. Like, I don't want to do this anymore. And I started researching how to heal naturally, and I implemented all of that into my life. And then once I, like, cleared out all of this toxic processed food, seed oils, all this stuff, my brain started working differently. And I was, like, realized that I could heal my body. Then I was like, okay, can I heal my mind, too? And so I went on the search on how to heal my depression and my anxiety and my medical issues. And I found a program that uses, like, an ancient technique of removing blocks and from the chakras and childhood traumas. And I did a teacher training on that and did all of the. All of the work on myself, and it just changed my whole life around. And that was when I realized I had conscious awareness of my thoughts and I could help. I could create my reality by not engaging with the negative ones and engaging with the positive ones and working on my mindset. And I was just like, this is the coolest thing that has ever happened to me in my life. And I know there's people out there that feel like they're at the end of the road with their hope.
And I was like, if I. If I can change my life, like, this can help other people, and I have to share it with them. So then I just kind of started this journey, and here we are.
[00:07:22] Speaker B: That sounds. It sounds like an amazing story and very inspiring. And you mentioned the word mindset quite a bit. And I think sometimes we just have to change our mindsets in order to progress. But I am also a firm believer that we have to continue to grow in our mindset. Like, I think once you got to where you want to be, the mistake is to just stay stagnant and just say, okay, well, I'm done. I think we have to continue to grow and continue to learn And I know it's something that I do for myself is continue to grow and continue to build and to learn.
And when you do that, then the growth doesn't stop. You just keep. You just keep growing.
[00:08:07] Speaker C: Yeah, that's. The more I learn, the more I'm like, man, I don't know very much. There's so much out there, and it's just like that old saying, right? Learn something new every day. I really feel like there's so much to learn, and you're never going to stop learning. And it's really cool to have an open mind, too, and see other people's point of view and not just shut it down right away. Because when you're open and take that in without being triggered by it, sometimes there's just, like, little nuggets of wealth there that you never even would have thought of. And so it's really cool to see other people's perspectives on everything as well.
[00:08:49] Speaker B: Absolutely. At a conversation of mindset can go. We can go on and on and on about mindset. That's what I'm. That's what I'm learning for sure. So.
[00:08:56] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:08:57] Speaker B: So, Miranda, how do our thoughts and beliefs influence the way we show up in challenging situations?
[00:09:06] Speaker C: I mean, I think.
I think they're everything.
Because when you have negative thoughts and beliefs, you. You block yourself from more opportunities, Right? Because you're. Sometimes you're living from a state of fear or shame or guilt. And so instead of moving forward and trying something, you just shut yourself down with the negative thoughts, like, I'm not good enough or I'm too much, or I don't deserve this. And so that's why a part of my work is removing those subconscious beliefs. But I really think mindset is everything for these new things, because sometimes you'll just shut yourself down before you even try the opportunity.
[00:09:54] Speaker B: Yeah. Block yourself from more opportunities. I love that. Because. Yeah. I think people either lose confidence in themselves or they don't feel.
They just feel that they can't do it. Right. So they block themselves. And then they figure, well, if I can't do it, I'm not gonna try.
And I think we just talked about growth. I think you. You don't. You don't continue to grow if you do that.
[00:10:26] Speaker C: Yeah, that's like just. I always say be scared and do it anyways. The things that challenge us and scare us also help us to grow.
And it's okay to go into it not knowing how to do anything. Like, so I'm trying to step out of my box More right, My comfort zone. And yesterday I went to Jiu J, Jiu Jitsu class, which I've been thinking about for years, but I've always been too embarrassed to go. And so I found a class and it's like just stepping out of your box and it's like, we've all been there, we've all been super terrified, but just not letting that negative mindset get in the way, being like, you can't do this and just go for it, go for it.
[00:11:08] Speaker B: So Miranda, what happens when we allow fear, self doubt or limiting beliefs make our decisions for us?
[00:11:17] Speaker C: We stay stagnant. Right? The brain doesn't wants to keep you in comfort.
So when you allow that fear and other things to control you, you're gonna stay right where you are. Because even if it's a really negative situation that you're in, it's familiar, so it's comfortable.
So your body and your nervous system know how to navigate that. So, so you just, you're gonna stay where you are. And that may be a good thing or a bad thing for you, but if you have an vision of what you want your life to be and you have dreams, you're really gonna have to figure out how to take that step outside of your comfort zone and not let and be scared and do it anyways.
[00:12:02] Speaker B: Our brain wants to keep us in comfort. We are people who love comfort. And yes, in certain situations, comfort is good. You want your comfort food, you wan in a comfortable situation, you want to relax during the day, we get that. But if you're staying stagnant in a certain thing and you're kind of like, oh, nothing's really happening for me, then nothing's going to change. So getting out of that comfort level or getting out of that comfort zone is super important.
[00:12:32] Speaker C: That's where the, the beauty is, right? The excitement. You're going to meet people, you're going to have new experiences. And it's like you would have never had those opportunities if you didn't just get out of your comfort zone. And it's okay to be nervous and feel scared.
[00:12:49] Speaker B: So, Miranda, how can leaders help create environments where people feel safe enough to grow and challenge their own thinking?
[00:12:57] Speaker C: I think a part of it is showing your own vulnerability by if, say, you implement a new policy that they are scared of or that they feel is going to be overwhelming, listening to them express those concerns, understanding where they're coming from. And then I think like, where I was at my work was I really like to get up and try to implement the new system with them and participate in that because you can show like, yeah, I feel like this is a little overwhelming, or, I'm nervous too. Let's go do this together. And just showing that vulnerability, listening to them. Them and then participating in it with them can help create that comfort and realize, like, I can be nervous, but I can still do this because I have support.
[00:13:54] Speaker B: I think the vulnerability part that you talked about is important here because we're.
And I talk about this a lot, we're not going to have all the answers. And I think where that. That vulnerability comes into play there, and if we can understand that, then I think we're going to, I think, build more bonds with people and build more relationships with people if they see that side of us as well, because they'll see the human side and they'll be like, okay, they actually are human.
[00:14:25] Speaker C: Yeah. I also think it's super cool if you work in a company that's small enough when change is implemented, when the staff have conflict about it, to be like, well, if you have any ideas to help us move through this process in a smoother, With a smoother flow, I'd be happy to hear those. And sometimes to get them engaged in creating ideas for rolling out a new policy or procedure and creating a smooth flow can help the team feel involved and they're heard as well.
[00:14:56] Speaker B: If we want to create truly inclusive spaces, how important is it that we first challenge our own mindset, assumptions and the way that we see people who are different from us?
[00:15:09] Speaker C: My goodness. I think it's everything. I think that. And when I started doing my work on myself and really working through my blocks and my traumas and my ego and realizing that hurt people, hurt people. And seeing where it helped me by being vulnerable and doing all of that work, it really helped me to see when my staff had concerns where that was really coming from and not getting angry or upset or irritated because you realize those emotions in people are coming from an insecurity or a fear. And it just makes it easier to, like, understand that we're all going through things and we've all been through different things, and there's just, like, love and acceptance. You know what I mean?
[00:16:08] Speaker B: Yeah. I love when you said that hurt people, hurt people. Makes me think of a situation where somebody is coming in all excited, in a great mood, and then they say hi to someone, and then that person is not in the greatest mood. Then those assumptions come in like, oh, what's wrong with them? And did I do something? It just might be something that they're going through and are dealing with. And that has nothing to do with what you had to do, what you did, or what you said.
[00:16:35] Speaker C: Totally not taking ownership of other people's reactions, realizing that their reaction came from something that they're dealing with and not necessarily you. And you're like, oh. Instead of being, like, firing back with something crappy, you're like, oh, are. Are you okay? Like, is something bothering you? And you just have a lot more empathy for people.
[00:16:58] Speaker B: Yeah. I've been in a situation before in a retail store where there was a woman, and it was a huge lineup at the till, and she was just in a miserable mood. She was having a rough day. And I just took the time to ask her. I'm like, are you doing okay? Like, are you okay? And I think it just hit them at that point that, like, oh, my God. Yeah. Like, I'm not okay. And then they just took some time to just kind of talk to me, whatever, a few minutes. There was a big lineup, but she took some time to talk to me. And I think she felt better after that just to kind of let everything out. But somebody actually asking her everything was actually okay.
And actually standing there to hear what she had to say, I think was important to her at the time.
[00:17:44] Speaker C: Yeah, I think that's so beautiful. I think you probably changed her a whole day.
[00:17:49] Speaker B: So, Miranda, before we wrap up here, what is one key takeaway that you like our listeners to remember from this episode?
[00:18:02] Speaker C: Let's see.
I'm torn between hurting people, hurt people, and be scared and do it anyways.
I think be scared and do it anyways. It gives you the opportunity to really grow and expand, and then hurting people, hurt people. And it just. If you can keep that in mind, like, the next time somebody comes at you, I hope that you can take it a lot less personally and remember to just check with them and be like, are you okay? Is there anything you need to talk about? Because it's not usually a reflection of you. It's a reflection of their internal state.
[00:18:44] Speaker B: I love that you use both things there. So I love that you didn't hold back, and I love that you squeezed. That's awesome.
Miranda, I wanted to take the time to thank you for coming on today.
Some of the things I. That I admire about you is I just admire your genuine nature, your resilience, your balance, your ability to create a sense of safety for others, your ability to inspire without even trying to.
And just your genuine nature. You just are just a genuine human. And it's just been an absolute pleasure to not just to have you on here today as a guest, but to to have met you as well.
[00:19:26] Speaker C: You're the best. Thank you. It has really been wonderful to meet you and do all of this. And you're just, you're a rock star, and I can't wait to read your book.
[00:19:37] Speaker B: Oh, well, I appreciate that. Well, thank you so much.
On behalf of myself and my guest, Miranda. I'd like to thank you all for listening today. And until next time, be safe. And remember, everyone, that if we all work together, we can accomplish anything.
[00:19:53] Speaker A: You have been listening to let's Be Diverse with Andrew Stout. To stay up to date with future content, hit Subscribe.
