Radiant Leadership

[00:00:04] Speaker A: Opinions expressed in this episode are personal. [00:00:07] Speaker B: They do not necessarily reflect the views of this streaming platform. [00:00:14] Speaker A: Good day, everyone, and welcome to another edition of let's be diverse. I am your host, Andrew Stout. This episode is dedicated to all my loved ones who have supported me through this journey. As a leader, I feel it's very important to continually learn. A few weeks ago, I saw a post from my guest today regarding the topic radiant leadership, and I thought, what an interesting topic. So I thought I would have her on and delve into a little bit further. So our topic today is radiant leadership. And I am so lucky to have as my guest today, Andrea Andre. Now, Andrea did everything she thought a successful woman is supposed to do. Go to college, get a job, get married, and start a family. When she had all the things she thought to make her happy, she realized she felt the opposite. Her life was both overwhelming and boring. She was not living the life she had imagined for herself. It took her years to realize that she wasn't living her full life at all. She was living the life she was told to live. Now she's passionate about helping other women evaluate their lives by rewiring their inner landscape and activating their inner radiance. I met this person on LinkedIn. I clicked with her. We had a conversation, and right away we got along. I just thought that she was a phenomenal person, so upbeat, so friendly, outgoing. And I just thought, we got to get her on. So today is a day, and I'm so happy to have her on. Welcome to the show, Andrea. It's so awesome to have you here today. [00:01:53] Speaker B: Yeah, thank you, Andrew. It's so great to be here, and it's so fun to see you face to face for the first time when we're both in our pajamas. So that's always the beauty of podcasting. I love it. [00:02:02] Speaker A: It certainly is. It certainly is. How are things with you? What's new in your world? Weather, work, home? How was the summer? Did you have a nice vacation? Did you take a nice trip? How's everything go? [00:02:15] Speaker B: Yeah, everything was really great. I'm sure we'll get into this a little bit. I started my business, my coaching business just under a year ago. And so with my two young kids, they're seven and five, I made more of an effort to, I call them mommy camp weeks. And so previous summers, they've just been in daycare summer camp all summer. But I said, you know what? I started this business for more flexibility and to spend more time with my family. And so I intentionally carved out a few weeks this summer and spent a week with my family in Michigan. And we had a few weeks here in Wisconsin where we toyed around and we were like tourists in our own area. It was a really special part of summer for me because that was the first time I haven't been in corporate all summer and just had all of that freedom to be able to do that. So I was very happy to do that and also very happy that the kids are back in school now. [00:03:06] Speaker A: It's funny that you mentioned that because we have a commercial here. I don't know if you guys have, but in Canada it is a commercial. I can't remember the name of company. But anyways, they played Christmas music at the most wonderful time of the year. And it's showing the parents are shopping for school supplies and the kids are like walking like mopily down the aisles and the parents are jumping for joy, celebrating and everything. I don't have children, but I can imagine when it's the beginning of summer, it's okay. We're going to have so much fun, spend some time together, and then when it's time to go back to school, you're like, I get my me time back. Can totally sympathize with that, for sure. [00:03:48] Speaker B: Yeah. For not having kids. You nailed it. That's exactly how it is. [00:03:52] Speaker A: So I'm glad to hear that you guys had a good summer. And I love your idea of mommy camp weeks. I just think that's such a great idea. And I'm sure it must get the kids excited to spend time with mom and do fun things and stuff and keep them active because I'm sure in your household, if you don't keep them busy, I'm sure you hear quite often, mom, I'm bored. [00:04:15] Speaker B: Yes. That's what it is with kids every day is how can I burn out their energy? That is the goal every day. [00:04:21] Speaker A: I love that you shared all that. I appreciate that. Thanks for doing that. Before we begin, I always have a fun question to ask my guests to get things going. Are you ready for yours? [00:04:32] Speaker B: I don't know. I'm nervous. We'll find out. [00:04:34] Speaker A: It's pretty simple. I think you'll like it. So my question to you is, if you were given the opportunity to have 15 minutes of fame, what would you do with it? [00:04:46] Speaker B: I would love to be on top chef as a celebrity or a guest judge. I watch it. It's one of those shows that it's not fully satisfying. It's mostly satisfying because you can see the food, but you can't taste the food. And someday I would love to just be able to taste the food and just know how amazing it all is. [00:05:05] Speaker A: I'm with you. I'm a foodie, too, and shows. I would love to be a guest. You're exactly right. And tasting the food and judging and telling the cook what you thought and all that stuff. Yeah, I'm with you on that one, for sure. [00:05:18] Speaker B: Yeah, that wasn't too bad. Good question. [00:05:21] Speaker A: Thanks for having fun with me. I really appreciate that. Why don't we start off with you telling us a little bit about you and your story? [00:05:28] Speaker B: Yeah, you got a little bit of my story in the intro, but just to hear it again in my own words. So I was a pretty traditional, overachieving woman. I did the high school thing, went on to college, and as I graduated college and entered the workforce, I had this checklist in my head of, I want to do all these things by the time I'm 30, and that's when I'll be really happy. And I think a lot of. I've heard my story in a lot of women, and so I know I'm not unique. Everyone just has their own flavors of this. And so I went on, and I pretty much achieved everything on my list. I didn't make it by 30. I got it by 31. But there was a master's degree and getting a job with a good salary and the marriage and the baby and the house. And so the pretty traditional stuff that you hear a lot of people talk about, and my baby was six months old. We moved into our house, and it was like I was looking around and just expecting happiness to find me and this feeling of success to find me, and I found that I felt the complete opposite. And not only did I not, I couldn't feel anything, I looked at my baby daughter, and I'm like, I know I'm supposed to love you, but I couldn't even feel love in my heart. I took her to a daycare that I didn't love, to go to a job that I didn't love, and I literally couldn't feel anything. And so I had that. And then as time turned on and new motherhood turned on, I just felt like everything was about going through the motions. You rush out the door to get to daycare, to get to work. You rush home from work, to get to dinner, into bed, and life just. It was really boring but overwhelming. I felt busy, but I wasn't busy with anything that was filling me up at all. And so I didn't know exactly what to do about it. I knew there was this inner feeling going on. Now that I'm looking back, I had this inner feeling going on. But at the time, I was so disconnected from any feeling in my body that I actually having bad behavior at work, which is very unlike me. I've always been a rule follower. And so I started just throwing some team member under the bus, kept blaming him for everything that was going on in our project, even though it was not his fault, just because there was this inner turmoil in my body. And I had this voice telling me that if you stay on this corporate path, you won't be living up to your highest potential. And I was like, that sounds scary. And I did what most of us would do. I blamed the job for the unhappiness and I got a new one and got pregnant again. So I distracted myself pretty sufficiently for a while. And then eventually I get back to the new job, and this one was totally different. We had a daycare that we loved. I had a really great maternity leave. I had a job that I loved. And the feelings were a lot different this time. I didn't want to go back to the job, even though I enjoyed the job and I was in a place. And then that unsettled feeling came back. And finally I said, okay, what am I going to do about this feeling? Because as I know now, these unsettled feelings, they're going to try really hard to get our attention if we don't listen. And I read a book. It was a new earth by Eckhart Tolle. And that book pretty much changed the trajectory of my life where I left that book and put that book down, truly believing that if I figured out what my soul was here to do and did that job, and then I would be fully supported and resourced by the universe. And that was what I was supposed to do. That's what we're all here to do, is align and live as our soul. And so I said, you know what? I don't know what this looks like, but this idea of this total unknown actually feels a lot less scary than staying in this corporate job, trading my time for money over and over for 30 some years until I quote unquote, retire. And so I said, all right, universe, I threw my hands up and I was like, show me and I will follow. So I've been on a learning journey and an inner journey ever since. [00:09:22] Speaker A: First off, what an amazing story. I want to say you're absolutely right. It's amazing. Doing this podcast, you said that there's a lot of people that were familiar, and I knew that there was a lot of familiar stories like that. But doing this podcast, it's totally given me a new light, a new reality, and a new outlook on that. And I'm totally seeing it even more than I thought. Like double, triple of what I thought. And more and more I'm thinking like, oh, my God. I knew people were at some points unhappy with what they were doing. I'm amazed at the fact that there's so many. So that's the first thing I want to say, and I just love, the other thing I want to say is, I just love your line. I figured out my soul and what I was here to do. I just love that line. I think that's so beautifully said. And it just tells the story of what we are all supposed to do. And I truly believe in having passion for what you're doing. I think it's very important. And once you have passion, then you can go so far, the innovation comes out, the creativity comes out. So I think it's so important, rather than sitting in a job that you just don't like or you're just not happy or you're not uncomfortable. And like you said, doing the things, paying the bills, picking up the kids, dropping them off at school, going to work or dropping off at daycare, go to work, hang out, do your job, come home, have supper, homework or bath time or whatever, get them ready for bed. You have time to relax and then starting it all over again. And a lot of those times I find people, they have that time where they're at home and they have unwind, and then there's that thought process, oh, my God, I got to go back to that place again tomorrow, and I really don't want to go back there. What am I going to do? I'm stuck. I feel like I'm stuck. I feel like I'm in a hole and I can't dig out of it. That's this feeling that I know that I've had. And like I said, I'm realizing as I'm doing these episodes so many others are having, that I really appreciate you sharing your story. I think it's important for the listeners to be hearing it more and more that a lot of us have been in these situations. It is possible to get out and do exactly what you want to do for sure. [00:11:55] Speaker B: Yeah, I'm not surprised that you're hearing it a lot because people who get to that point of despair, many of them then choose to do something different. And I'm sure you're attracting a sort of audience with your podcast of those people who have chosen to do something different. And I'm sure you're self selecting in a way for those stories, too, based on who you're choosing for your podcast. And so to me, that makes a lot of sense that you're hearing it over and over. [00:12:20] Speaker A: Yeah. And to be quite honest, Andrea, I don't even know that those stories are coming. So that's the amazing part, is, so I'll explain this and then we'll keep going because I know we're going a little bit off. But when I look for a guest, I use my HR skills. I use hard skills and soft skills. So most people, I would say when they're looking for a podcast guest, they look for people who have the content that they're looking for and then they produce it. I am the opposite. I look for the soft skills first. So I scour LinkedIn, see what people are putting out there, look at their posts, jot down notes, and when I see enough stuff that I say, wow, this person is really awesome. I really think that they would make a good guest and create good content and it would have an easy flowing conversation with them. I need to get them on. Once they say yes, then I worry about the content because I feel that I'm not worried about the content because I am confident in my abilities to find a topic that will work for the type of episode and the type of things that I want to talk about. And as long as they fit around leadership, HR or the workplace, I'm happy. That's the way that I look at it. But yes, to answer your question, my long winded reply to what you said, I look at people and how they are and what they're putting out there. And a lot of people don't put what you've said in what you're posting. They're just posting on where they are now and what they're doing. But a lot of them don't post what happened to them previous. So when they come on and I hear these stories, I sit back and listen and I'm thinking, my God, this is unbelievable. Like another one. I love it that we're talking about it because there's another person. So I'm just enjoying these conversations and where they start off. [00:14:23] Speaker B: Yeah, good. Thank you. [00:14:25] Speaker A: Today we're going to be talking about radiant leadership. I want to know from you, what is radiant leadership? [00:14:32] Speaker B: Yeah, I know this takes some explaining because this was something that I channeled in meditation. So it's not something that I've seen necessarily out yet, but as I've been fine tuning, how am I here to help, and what am I here to offer the world? This concept came in, and for me, it's really. We'll start with the leadership portion, because for me, the leadership portion is really more of a self leadership, especially for women. For way too long, we have been trying to define us and our leadership based on things outside of us. And so how many degrees or certifications do I have? How many projects did I do successfully on time or under budget? And I've had clients in my sessions say, I don't know what other people value in me. And it's like, why are we trying to morph ourselves into what other people think we should be? And so the leadership portion, to me, is really about self leadership. How can I be the leader of myself in my life, and how can I be the truest, most authentic version of me and just shine that out into the world and not try to morph who I am into the perceptions of other people? And so it's really bringing the idea of leadership back internally. It has nothing to do with your role in a corporation or if you lead teams or don't lead teams. It's really about, are you being a leader over yourself in your life? And for me, the radiant portion came in because I alluded to a little bit what my soul is here to do. So I bring an element of spirituality into my work as well. I'm a transformational and spiritual coach. And when I say spirituality, I don't mean religion. What I mean by spirituality is really just understanding who we are at the deepest level and who we're here to be and express. As, while we're in these human bodies and our souls are a form of light. And the more people align to their soul and live from their soul, literally, they can look lighter, they can glow. They have this high vibration, this radiance to them. They're magnetic. Because people are attracted to people who are truly being themselves. They don't necessarily know why, but there's just this magnetism to people who are truly standing in their power. And so, for me, radiant leadership is really the combination of the two of them. It's just self leadership. Who am I being at my most authentic level, and when I am that, it's my soul. It's this light energy. It's this high, vibrational, attractive energy. I am so radiant, so magnetic that people just can't take their eyes off of me. [00:17:08] Speaker A: There's so many things I want to pack in there. So I just love everything that you just said there. So, first off, I love the fact that you said understanding who we are and the reason why I love that is because I truly believe that a leader who is vulnerable allows their team to see them in a vulnerable state. And for me, that is a genuine characteristic which then builds trust, respect and building rapport as well. So I just love when you said that. I think that it's something that a lot of leaders, I believe, do not have. They feel that they can't be vulnerable because they're afraid to show that they have a vulnerable side and they feel that they have to have a tough exterior. I believe that it's been years since that people are looking for the opposite of it. And I think the pandemic brought out even more of that. And people are. When you talked about your story that you were not happy with where you were, I think people are more and more in control now of what they want and what they're looking for and what they need as far as a career. People talk about work life balance, but I like to say work life integration because I don't believe in work life balance. I think it's very hard. I think we have to try to integrate it because you're going to bring some of your stuff home and you're going to bring some of your stuff to work. [00:18:48] Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely. And especially on that, too. It's not just stuff, but it's just who you are. A lot of people think that I can box myself off and I can leave the work part of me at work, or I can leave the home part of me at home. But you are you wherever you go. We carry the same belief systems, the same pain in our energy body. I don't believe that we can segment part of our lives. I think that we certainly lose the authentic part of us when we do that. But it's also just really hard because you're trying to shove things down that naturally want to come up, and it's just not easy because your body doesn't say, all right, I'm walking into work, I'm not going to talk about this thing anymore. That's our brain that's got to put in a lot of energy to try to do that. So I agree. You are you wherever you go. [00:19:31] Speaker A: And you talked about it before when you were talking about not being happy. Your work, you, along with other people who are not happy, they're bringing their unhappiness home. And I spoke to a woman a couple of weeks ago, and she was saying that she was at the point where she didn't even want it. Like, she got home, her kids want to play with her, and she just did not have the capacity to play with them because she just was not in a state of happiness, and she found herself like, oh, my God, my kids are wanting to play with me, and I am thinking about work. This is not good. I don't want my kids to start to see this as they get older and think, oh, my God. Mom never had time for us because she was too busy with work. So that was her calling to say, I need to make a change. I don't know what it is, but I got to figure it out. It's hard to figure stuff out like that on a whim or overnight. But beginning the process of doing that is very important. [00:20:35] Speaker B: Absolutely, yes. And yeah, you're right. It's just one step at a time. You don't have the final answer when you get started. You just take one step, and then one step and then one step for sure. [00:20:46] Speaker A: So why is radiant leadership? Why do you think it's so important, especially, like, in an organization? [00:20:53] Speaker B: I look beyond the organization, and that's where I get a little deep. But for me, being the truth of who we are is the only reason that we're on this planet is for us to take human form and then for us to learn how to express our soul through human form. And so I feel like we're not here to make the most money. We're not here to get the most degrees. We're literally here to be who we are meant to be in the fullest possible way. And so I look at corporations. Those are all man invented entities. I take it a step further. What is our universal reason here? And for me, I really think that this is what we're all here to do, what we're all here to learn and master. And that's why it's important to me. [00:21:40] Speaker A: I love it. I do agree with you for sure when you say the truth of who we are. And I think whatever you're doing, it's important to figure out who we are, why we're here, what are we supposed to do? And you said, also learning to express it. I think it's important to understand how to express it and learn how to do that instead of sitting back in the wings and letting other people express what they think. I think it's important to come to the table and express that as well. [00:22:08] Speaker B: For sure. Yeah, absolutely. [00:22:10] Speaker A: So this probably is going to be a really deep question for you. So I'm really interested to hear your answer on this. I love the fact that you've thought about this radiant leadership. What does the future look like for. [00:22:21] Speaker B: Radiant leadership for me, coming from an individual? So we'll start at that lens first. So me and then everybody as them, I would just love to see people walking through the world unapologetically themselves. They're not being aholes to people, but they don't care what other people think about them. They know who they are, they know what they're here to be, they know what they deserve, and they go out there and they get it. And so they're able to live these amazing lives that we're all worthy of living. We all are deserved of living. And so from an individual level, I would just love to see people be happy and to see people lit up. And when you do that, I think that we're all here to express in a certain way. And I think we're also here to help improve the planet in our own way. I like to say we've all got our little corner of the planet that we're here to improve. And so can you imagine if everyone was living as themselves and they were living the thing that they're most passionate about and making the planet a little bit better in their own unique way? Like what the world would look like if we all did that? That's just the world I live in. In my vision is just we're all here living and contributing and we're all happy. There isn't a hustle and a grind. We're happy, we're lit up, we're communicating with each other and experiencing each other, and it's just a nice place to live. And I know it sounds like Utopia, but I like to go in the future and at least look at possibilities to have as a north star for me to start to move towards and talk about whether we totally get there. At least if you're talking about it, you're moving people in a direction that gets you closer and closer to it. [00:24:04] Speaker A: I love that for sure. I just love everything that you packed in there. I think it's so good. I think it's so important that we understand what we're here to do. And you said happy, which is the key thing right there. I think that we're just not happy. A lot of times I walk down the street and I smile at somebody and they don't smile back and they just look like they're. I don't know what we just never know what's going on with somebody. But it's just amazing how somebody could just look at you like, what are you doing? Why are you smiling at me? And I'm just trying to be friendly. I'm a friendly guy and I'm just trying to smile because I am happy. And I like when people smile at me. I used to be somebody who used to worry about other things that were not in my control. And I've learned now to concentrate on the things that are in my control doesn't mean that I'm going to ignore the things that I don't have control of. But I just can't dedicate my life and my time to those things. So I look at it and I go, is it in my control? And if it's not, then I don't ignore it, but I just leave it because it really is not worth it to get ourselves all wrapped up and stuff. And you just try to do things that are in your control, which makes us all feel better. [00:25:29] Speaker B: I agree. Yeah. And the power of our focus is a really powerful creator of our reality, too. And so I like to tell people, if you're worrying you're putting out a vibration into the universe, that the universe is going to match somehow, and do you really want it to match? It might not be the exact thing that you're worrying about, but the universe doesn't judge, it just matches. And I don't want them to be matching things like that. And so you're right, it's helpful to try to live as intentionally as possible from a place of joy or happiness or wherever you can get to. We can't live there 100% of the time, but if we can try to get there more and try to start to stretch ourselves, then we're going to be bringing situations back to us that match that. Yeah. I also agree. I try not to worry about things that I can't control. [00:26:17] Speaker A: No, it's not worth it. And I love what you're doing. I love how you're working with people and how you're helping them and your message. I just love that. I think it's so important. And I could see how people could come out of it thinking positive and realizing that they can do what they want, or like you say, learning to express themselves and figuring out the truth of who they are. I think those things are so important. And whether it's in your job or your home life or your projects or what have you, I think just having that confidence is super important, for sure. [00:26:53] Speaker B: Absolutely. [00:26:54] Speaker A: If you could choose one word to describe yourself. What word would that be? [00:27:00] Speaker B: The word that just came in was fearless. And, yeah, I don't know. It's not that I don't feel fear, but I made a decision in 2020 when Covid hit not to make decisions from a perspective of fear. And so I've really been working on moving forward despite my fear, or in some cases, I don't have the fear anymore. [00:27:25] Speaker A: I look at that word, and I don't think that there could be any better word for you, in my opinion, from your story. I honestly, God, I feel like that word is a true testament of who you are. We had such a great conversation, our first conversation over the phone, and I could just tell that you were like that right from the get go. And just hearing your story today and where you were and what you've accomplished and where you are now, you took a chance on yourself. And I would be very proud of you because there's not a lot of people that are willing to do that or are ready to do that, but you did it. And, yeah, I'd say fearless is perfect word for you. [00:28:09] Speaker B: Thank you. I feel like I should say thanks, dad. Thanks, dad, for being proud of me. [00:28:13] Speaker A: It did sound like a dad compliment. Yeah. [00:28:16] Speaker B: But I'll take it. Thank you. [00:28:19] Speaker A: Any final thoughts today? [00:28:20] Speaker B: One thing I just like to tell everybody, wherever you are in life is exactly perfect for you. It's not a race. There is no competition. Everyone is on their own timeline, on their own path. And many of us, we're not meant to be out of the pain. We're meant to play in the pain. So that way, we can get the motivation to get ourselves out. And wherever you are, just look at it as part of your journey. And whenever the time is right for you to make a move and take the next step, I know that you will love that. [00:28:55] Speaker A: I just want to thank you for taking the time to come on and chat with us this evening. I love your story. Like I said, I love where you have come from, and I just love your message. It brings such positivity along with a side of compassion and empathy. You really show that you are a caring person. You care about every individual that you come in contact with. And I truly believe that you want the best for everybody, and that's a quality that a lot of people try to get to, and you have that. So I want to thank you for coming on. I appreciate you. I appreciate our conversations, and I just appreciate this conversation today, I think. [00:29:43] Speaker B: Yeah, thank you. And, Andrew, I want to say thank you to you. I remember from our first conversation you made me feel very safe to just talk about whatever the heck I wanted to talk about. You said, this podcast, I want diversity. I want different perspective. And so I knew I could bring my woo a little bit and it was going to be welcome. And thank you for creating the space for all of these conversations and for giving me a chance to tell my story. I really appreciate it. [00:30:07] Speaker A: Those are very kind words. I truly appreciate that. Thank you very much. On behalf of myself and my guest Andrea, I would like to thank you all for listening. And until next time, be safe. And remember that if we all work together, everyone we can accomplish you have listening to let's be diverse with Andrew Stout. To stay up to date with future content, hit subscribe.